Mini-Rants
As the title implies these are short rants about some stupidity I think has occurred - usually by the studios or TV writers. There may occasionally be rants about fanfic in here but I will never mention a specific writer or fic and will try to speak in as general terms as possible regarding whatever fic device has managed to annoy me this time. ;>
Don Cheadle replaces Terrence Howard in Iron Man
franchise?
Nothing against Don Cheadle, love everything I've seen him in, but what moron
thought he would make a good Jim Rhoades? Or an action-oriented military man for
that matter? He's a great comedic actor, he's great at drama but I cannot see
him as an action star. Yes, the focus is Iron Man, so by default Robert Downey
Jr, and okay he doesn't seem your typical action star either *but* the character
Tony Stark isn't really an action hero. Tony Stark is genius who creates the
Iron Man armor and alter ego but once the armor is on it could be anyone under
there. We as the audience don't actually have to accept Downey as a full-fledged
action hero because we never see *him* being one ie see his body fighting
someone else.
Why doesn't the same argument apply to Cheadle, you ask? Simple. Jim Rhoades is
a military man. Terrence Howards looks like he could be in the military. True we
never see him in a fight but the audience can easily perceive him as a military
man. Don Cheadle? Sorry, just because you slap a uniform on him does not make me
think he's military. I can think of half a dozen other actors I would more
easily believe in that role before I could see Cheadle. Even once they stick him
in the War Machine, at least I assume they will be, they are going to have to do
a lot of work to make me believe Cheadle is Jim Rhoades.
It doesn't mean I won't keep an open mind when I go to see Iron Man 2 or
Avengers, whichever comes first, but the studio will have to work that much
harder to make me buy into Cheadle.
CSI: Miami Rants
Boa Vista as a CSI? WTF?!
Okay, I admit I've never liked Boa Vista as a character. She just always seemed
too smug which, to me, frequently translated to too bitchy. The whole playing
Eric and Ryan off of each other in pursuit of her with her being 'clueless' felt
almost as unbelievable as the Horatio/Marisol pairing, which is a whole other
rant, and greatly irritated me. Then they had the two episodes where Boa Vista
happened to live in a rather affluent neighborhood, that I'm sorry she should
not be able to afford on a lab tech's salary, just down the street from a crime
scene where she followed Ryan around like a puppy dog and the episode where it
comes out that she's part of an underground railroad for battered women escaping
their abusive husbands. Now, at the time, I brushed these subplot points off as,
well, minor subplots for an irritating character; especially once it came out
that Boa Vista was the mole and everyone in the lab, rightly so, hated her. In
hindsight now I realize what the writers were really trying to do - make a
disliked character sympathetic if not likeable.
Once the whole mole thing came to a conclusion, and concluded the 4th season
along with the ridiculous Marisol plot, I figured that would be if not the end
of Boa Vista then she at least would have a reduced role until she just
disappeared because, really, there's no reason to have two DNA techs on the same
shift on the show. Real life, yes, on the show, no. Especially not when Valera
is a pretty well-liked character for a recurring. So I'm watching the season 5
premiere when wham! I'm hit with Boa Vista as a full-fledged CSI that *no one*
is holding a grudge against for being a lying back-stabbing bitch who other than
one small part of an episode never showed any interest in being a CSI. Greg
Sanders spent at least a season if not longer hinting that he wanted to be a CSI
before he was let out into the field as a trainee.
Now that Boa Vista is a full-fledged CSI *with no explanation* as to why not
only is she still a smug bitch but she's frequently a smug bitch airhead who
walks around like she's always been a CSI who knows what she's doing and orders
others with far more seniority in the lab and PD around like she has the right.
Of course she's still a disliked character because then we have episodes where
her 'abusive' ex-con ex-husband shows up and makes life difficult for her and
then her little sister is kidnapped by a serial rapist/killer that are clearly
intended to make Boa Vista seem more sympathetic to the audience which instead
make her seem like more of an idiot. I won't even get started on the episode
where the ex-husband, whom she's warning Valera is dangerous and then we find
out Boa Vista is sleeping with him again, is killed and both Boa Vista and
Valera are suspects. How the hell this woman managed to get and *keep* a job in
a *Federal* lab is beyond me. Oh wait, the writers think this is good
television.
Now I admit I haven't seen season 6 or any of 7 yet but I find it incredibly
hard to believe that Boa Vista is suddenly going to become a more likeable
character. Sadly I think this series, which has always had a flair of the
ridiculous - Caruso's hammy stylized Caine comes to mind - finally jumped the
shark with the two-part season 4 finale, season 5 premiere and now the audience
is watching the death throes to see just how bad it's going to get before they
finally, mercifully pull plug.
Ryan fired and rehired? Again WTF?!
Alright I know that this isn't real life but you'd think a 'drama' would
actually attempt to follow some of the rules of real life. It goes against all
credibility to think that Ryan would be fired for gambling, on the clock at
that, and then an episode later all he has to do is apologize to Caine for not
telling him the truth in the first place and suddenly he's allowed his job
back?! WTF?!?! Never in a million years would any employer do that, much less a
police lab.
The other issue I have with this unrealistic little two-episode sub-plot is what
was the point of it? The point I can see for it is to highlight the fact that as
long as you tell Caine all your secerets he'll make sure your problems go away
but if you don't...he happily sits back and lets you be hung out to dry by IAB.
Of course if you come crawling back to him and tell him you done wrong and
you'll never do it again then he'll apparently pull some strings and get you
your job back. WTF?!
<sigh> Unfortunately I know this will not be the last unbelievable, unrealistic
WTF?! moment to come in this rapidly declining series. The question becomes just
how long will I be able to stomach the ridiculousness of it before I give up?